Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
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We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
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We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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