just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize