im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
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