Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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