Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
