Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Randomize
