Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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