just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
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