I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
