To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Randomize
