You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
