No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
