She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
