Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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