Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
