your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
