Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
