Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
