I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
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