i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
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