When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
