he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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