If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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