I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
