this just has baby written all over it
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
