i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Well I just put wine in my tea
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
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