"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
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