Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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