1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
