I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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