I looked at my own cervix.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
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