Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
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you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
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Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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