What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
