you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
