So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
