A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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