sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize