Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Do vagina's smell?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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