# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Randomize