How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
