The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
