I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I have so many feelings about this burrito
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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