plz talk dirty to me
Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
