I want to walk on stilts...naked
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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