Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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