I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
