Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize