Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize