I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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