She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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