I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
